Denim: a person's worst frenemy

I hate denim.

In my third year as a college student, I have been trying to dress better. Not that there’s anything wrong with constantly wearing leggings and big shirts, but I’ve been wanting to start the year on a more self-confident note. Due to that, I have been opting for more jeans and nice shirts than the comfortable alternative. However, I have learned one unfortunate side effect of wearing jeans and nice shirts.

I hate denim. The more I pull the fabric onto my legs, the more issues I notice with the concept of the clothing. As an adult female college student, many things frustrate me about denim. Especially the affordable denim that I typically can pick up from Target or Old Navy. Before anyone tells me that “real denim wouldn’t do any of this” or “a good pair of jeans is worth the price” let me just say, shush. Just shush. Let me complain about my under $30 denim in peace.

There is also a concern with the fit. It seems each morning when I pull on my pants, I have to spray a little bit of water on the denim to loosen it up, even though it is never loose enough to be comfortable. That is until I reach my sixth hour in my denim prison where the pants then become so loose, I could fit at least four potatoes in them with me. So, I spend the first half of the day feeling suffocated and uncomfortable. Then, I spend the next half having to hold up my pants at all times, which is frustrating and insanely annoying to have to deal with.

The ability for the fabric to rip and tear is also frustrating to the jean’s wearer. Sometimes you buy jeans that have pre-ripped holes in them, which can be fashionable and a fun little flair to any outfit. However, when you start wearing a new pair of jeans with a cute little fashionable rip and then put them in the dryer once and the rip grows four times bigger – that is where the true annoyance grows. You find yourself trying to slip into the jeans just to bust through the hole in the knee and trip over and slam into the wall. It has happened, trust me.

Then there is, of course, the thigh to waist ratio. The cursed thigh to waist ratio. If you ask any girl what she hates most about denim she will probably mention the thigh to waist ratio. If you don’t know about this ratio, then let me explain. Whenever you get a pair of jeans the jeans will get over your thighs beautifully, hugging your curves in all the right places. Then, the waistband is two times too big. Or you find some jeans that fit your waist and tucks your lower stomach bump (which we all have and is very natural, but randomly socially hated) away perfectly, yet it feels like your thighs are one booty drop away from busting out of the denim prison. It is one of the main plagues that us jean wearers face each time we slide down into the jean tube.

Jeans can help you feel and, possibly, look more put together. Yet in doing that, you may be signing yourself up for a six-to-eight hour period of uncomfortably tightness, looseness and the constant fear of ripping the thigh area. At least my butt looks great, and that, to me, is worth it.

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