A little-known fact about me is that I got held back in kinder-garten. I was a summer baby and younger than many of my classmates. I couldn’t socially keep up with my classmates and had no friends. My parents decided holding me back was the best option for me.
I was put in a class called T-1, short for Transition 1. This was a class for other kids like me who needed an extra development year between kindergarten and first grade. I actually had friends in this class and was able to communicate to adults.
Here I am, 21 and still a little socially awkward, but on my way toward graduating in May. The funny thing is I decided to finish college in three years. I’d like to say it was to make up for lost time, but the truth is this desperation to finish college in three years was born from loneliness.
I had a lot of trouble finding my place in college my freshman year. I tried band, something I loved in high school, but it had lost its sparkle. I so badly wanted to jump into my upper-level classes because I thought I would find solace in academics, specifically advertising.
I was at a point in my life where I considered transferring to a school closer to home just so I wouldn’t feel as lonely. Then one day I impulsively decided that I was going to take enough summer school to become a junior and get an apartment. I signed up for 12 hours’ worth of classes and drove to an apartment complex to take a tour.
With 60 hours under my belt, I was able to move off campus, and I could sign up for upper-level classes that had prerequisites of “junior- level standing.”
Once I got into my advertising classes, it wasn’t what I thought it would be. I felt lost all over again. The one thing I really looked forward to fell flat. I kept running away from the real problem: I was feeling extremely lonely at college.
I am reminded of one of my favorite quotes by Carl Jung, “Loneliness does not come from having no people around, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to you.”
There was one thing I always knew I had a passion for: writing. Time and time again, I found solace in putting words on paper. One of my professors asked me why I wasn’t a journalism major since I loved writing so much, and I did not have an answer for him. It was that moment that I realized journalism needed to be a path I took seriously in college, even if it wasn’t my major.
I always found my voice in writing. I could write anything from an essay to a journal entry and feel instantly better about my life. Writing seemed to be the cure to my loneliness. I joined The Pine Log to share my voice with others. This was hands down the best decision I’ve made in college.
Each week, I get to take someone else’s life and write a story about it. It has been incredibly cool to interact with so much of SFA. I’ve done stories about organizations like the ROTC and Twirl-o-Jacks to feature pieces on beloved professors and professional bassoon quartets. I love being able to talk about so much of SFA because of the stories I’ve written.
Being a staff member for The Pine Log has great benefits. I get to flash a press pass at people, and they let me into things (to cover them of course.) How cool is that?
I’ve met all my best friends in The Pine Log. I’ve been less lonely since I joined The Pine Log because I finally found a way to communicate. I also found people who understood my voice, and that means the world to me.